1. Social Skills: Seven Things Everyone Should Know
  2. The 30 most important things about effective communication everyone must know
  3. Nine Things You Should Know About Interpersonal Skills
  4. How To Overcome Your Shyness, The Ultimate Guide
  5. A Simple Guide To Introverts
  6. How You Can Overcome Social Anxiety
  7. 25+ Effective Networking Tactics To Improve Your Networking Skills
  8. How To Master The Basic Meet And Greet
  9. Master The Power Pose In Two Minutes
  10. The 20 All-Time Best Pieces Of Relationship Advice Ever
  11. How To Build Great Professional Relationships
  12. 30+ Techniques About Killing It With Public Speaking
  13. How To Give Impromptu Speeches
  14. How To Be A Smart/Witty Talker
  15. How To Speak And Influence People Like Barack Obama
  16. The 20 Best Tips For Speaking Better
  17. 100+ Useful Techniques For Great Small Talk
  18. Question Skills: How We Can Be Great At Asking Questions
  19. How To Give Feedback
  20. Active Listening Skills (How To Be A Great Listener)
  21. Presentation Skills: How To Give Great Presentations
  22. Rhetoric: Using Language Better To Communicate Effectively And Persuasively
  23. How To Be Assertive
  24. A Simple Guide To Understanding Body Language
  25. 15+ Tricks That Will Help You Catch People Lying
  26. 11 Really Useful NLP Techniques
  27. A Simple Guide To Emotional Intelligence
  28. Empathy
  29. How To Be Charismatic
  30. How To Develop Presence
  31. How To Be Charming, Likeable, And Interesting
  32. Personality Development: How You Can Improve Your Personality
  33. 20+ Tips On Handling Difficult People
  34. How To Run And Participate In Effective Meetings
  35. Teamwork Skills: How To Work In A Team Effectively
  36. How To Make (And Refute) Arguments
  37. How To Win An Argument
  38. How To Criticize
  39. Seven Simple Ways To Give Praise
  40. How To Complain
  41. Culture Smarts: Taking In Cultural Cues From Across The World
  42. How To (Really) Control Your Emotions
  43. Basics Of Phone Etiquette
  44. A Simple Guide To Non-Verbal Communication
  45. How to change people's minds: Use this 350-year old trick, now backed up by psychologists
  46. Infographic: Body Language Cues and Spotting Lies

A Simple Guide To Emotional Intelligence

A full man does not understand a hungry man.

- Anon


1. What is emotional intelligence?

Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups.


People with high EI go easily through life.

- They aren't easily angered or upset

- They make others feel good


This is basically all you need about emotional intelligence.

Common sense.

Rest is all theory anyway.


2. Daniel Goleman's EI model

Daniel Goleman gave the concept of emotional intelligence in a book with the same name.


Self-awareness: The ability to know one's emotions, strengths, weaknesses, drives, values and goals and recognize their impact on others while using gut feelings to guide decisions.

Self-regulation: Controlling or redirecting one's disruptive emotions and impulses and adapting to changing circumstances.

Social skills: Managing relationships to move people in the desired direction

Empathy: Considering other people's feelings especially when making decisions and

Motivation: Being driven to achieve for the sake of achievement.


3. The ability-based model

This is a variation on Goleman's EI model and says that EI includes four types of abilities:


Perceiving emotions: The ability to detect and decipher emotions in faces, pictures, voices, and cultural artifacts—including the ability to identify one's own emotions. Perceiving emotions represents a basic aspect of emotional intelligence, as it makes all other processing of emotional information possible.

Using emotions: The ability to harness emotions to facilitate various cognitive activities, such as thinking and problem solving. The emotionally intelligent person can capitalize fully upon his or her changing moods in order to best fit the task at hand.

Understanding emotions: The ability to comprehend emotion language and to appreciate complicated relationships among emotions. For example, understanding emotions encompasses the ability to be sensitive to slight variations between emotions, and the ability to recognize and describe how emotions evolve over time.

Managing emotions: The ability to regulate emotions in both ourselves and in others. Therefore, the emotionally intelligent person can harness emotions, even negative ones, and manage them to achieve intended goals.


However, this ability-based EI model hasn't been proven conclusively in the workplace.


4. Developing emotional intelligence through five key skills

Emotional intelligence consists of five key skills, each building on the last:


1. The ability to quickly reduce stress.

2. The ability to recognize and manage your emotions.

3. The ability to connect with others using nonverbal communication.

4. The ability to use humor and play to deal with challenges.

5. The ability to resolve conflicts positively and with confidence.


5. How to improve your EI


- Practice being humble without being shy or losing self-confidence

- Give others a chance to shine

- Recognize and accept your weak points - no one is perfect after all

- Be calm and in control during tough situations, when things go wrong

- Do not blame others. Do not get upset by delays. Do not get angry at others when things do not go as planned.

- Taking responsibility for your actions - e.g. say sorry ASAP and get to rectifying the damage

- Get in other people's shoes (empathy): How will they be affected by your actions? How will they feel if you get angry, change deadline...


6. The dark side of EI: People have written how smart people use emotional intelligence cynically, to get to the top, faking emotions, exploiting other people's emotions now that they are so emotionally smart.


'You’re four times more likely to find a psychopath at the top of the corporate ladder than you are walking around in the janitor's office.'

(Source: NPR - National Public Radio)


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