If you have read the guides to being great at communication, networking, charisma and others, you probably now have an idea of what makes you charming and likeable: Be interested in other people genuinely and nicely, and they will be interested in you, and like you. A lot. Be brief but bright, and you will never be boring.
It is all pretty common sense.
1. Charming and likeable people say nice things to people (things they know they want to hear). They are pretty good at listening and will say only stuff that is relevant and timely. They are good at getting people to open up - about their life and motivations, and they ask easy, open questions. They are comfortable with who they are, not trying to be something else, like a fake.
2. Charming and likeable show others that they value the relationship over other things (power, money). They are good givers (help) and sweet sharers (credit). Charming and likeable are not afraid to reveal their vulnerable side - think the characters George Clooney played when he was younger.
3. Charming and likeable people smile a lot and mind their manners, depending upon the situation. They keep their smartphone in their pocket, and keep it there until the conversation or meeting is over.
Whenever Roosevelt hosted someone at his house, he would stay up late the night before, 'reading up on the subject in which he knew his guest was particularly interested.'
- Attributed to Andrew Carnegie
4. Charming and likeable people tell nice little relevant stories (they always seem to have an anecdote or two) and are humorous in the unoffensive style.
5. Charming and likeable people are not afraid to reach out and touch, really touch I mean - a slight tap on hands, or gently touching the shoulder.
6. Charming and likeable people are upfront about embarrassing things from their past. People take them to be brave and trustworthy.
7. Charming and likeable people say something nice that brightens someone's day. 'I love the sound of your voice'. 'Take your time. I'm not in a rush'. 'I just can't do this without you'. 'Looking at you makes my day.'
8. Charming and likeable go with the flow and are basically the template for 'being at ease'.
9. Charming, Likeable and Interesting people lead interesting lives.
If you want to be a knight, act like a knight.
- Don Quixote theme
Thank you for reading.
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